So joining strangers in a group to run instances is the aim of this here game. That is to say, folks who want to be well-geared join groups of strangers on a daily basis to collect loot (some) and tokens – currently needed are “Emblems of Heroism” that can be exchanged to buy high level gear.
This process is called “pugging” (joining Pick-Up-Groups), and without it, folks like me wait around for guild members to be available to run instances. In a small guild like SAPs, this is not a frequent occurrence. I am not well-geared.
I woke up this morning with renewed determination – which in this case, is actually renewed bravery. I have always been nervous about joining groups of strangers for these things because so often they are full of jerks who are mean to me. Waaa. I have only ever pugged with a friend, which seems to serve as protection and validation against that harsh treatment.
I want to gear myself, and this is certainly the way. Pugs. Uggs.
Part of this for me is, once again, the boy-world thing. And probably that sense that being female doesn’t come with the chivalry and politeness that it so often does in offline groups. Here, everyone assumes I am male, and somehow that makes me feel even more like a little girl.
But the bottom line is that in order to play fully, this game is designed to involve strangers, for the most part.
I think part of my hesitation is the role this game plays in my life. I use it to escape, feel safe, somehow, and be silly-social. Well, and also to be intimate-social with C., but that seems to be on hold for the moment. In most cases, strangers do not offer that kind of fun and openness, and the risk is high they will be annoying, offensive, cruel, and selfish. Or just silent.
Whatever the case, that atmosphere is not one I am comfortable with in the game. For me, this is a relaxing space, not a working space. Pugs feel a lot like working at a construction site…. with all that implies.
Well, I’m going to do it. I’m going to click the button.